Without My Sidekick – by Laura Gohl

Photo: Copyright Laura Gohl

Transitions are never easy when it comes to family life.

I will never forget the day I brought my baby boy home from the hospital to meet his big sister (whose hands and feet looked absolutely gigantic after seeing her next to a newborn). I will also never forget walking down my stairs last Monday and seeing my adorable little boy wearing a backpack almost as big as he was, with his hair combed and sprayed, and a big smile on his face. The day had come. My youngest, my little buddy, was starting kindergarten. How had those 5 ½ years gone by so quickly?

Copyright Mikko Luntiala "Free" https://goo.gl/i5sCH3 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/

Copyright Mikko Luntiala “Free” https://goo.gl/i5sCH3 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/

I had my tissues ready in hand and we made the all-too-short walk to school. We stood outside for a while and listened to the principal’s first-day spiel, watched the Boy Scouts raise the flag, said the Pledge of Allegiance, and listened to the Star Spangled Banner (which always chokes me up, so it’s like the school staff was intentionally trying to make us kinder parents cry). But no tears; I held it together and was excited for my son to start a new adventure and meet new friends. Well . . . ok, no tears until I hugged him goodbye, then came the waterworks. Luckily I was able to hold it in until I was out of his view, and luckily I had my husband and lots of friends there to hug me and cheer me up!

We got through a week of school (granted, a short week because of literacy testing), and I was quickly adjusting to having three hours of quiet in the house each morning (he’s half day). It’s been strange not having my little sidekick with me constantly, but I’ve been consistent in my workouts, I’ve been able to make more business calls, and I’m amazed by how many more e-mails I can reply to when it’s silent and I’m not interrupted. I started looking into the future, thinking how nice it will be when both kids are in full-day school. I will be able to get so much more done during the day so that I won’t have to work at night, which is going to make our family life even better!

Copyright Howard County Library "Kindergarten" https://goo.gl/rnKRKj http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/

Copyright Howard County Library “Kindergarten” https://goo.gl/rnKRKj http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/

Then, this morning, I tried to let my daughter walk my son to his classroom. He grabbed my arm tightly and shook his head “no.” “Ok, buddy, I’ll walk you into the middle of the school and then you can walk to your classroom.” Walked in and I felt his grip get even tighter. “Ok, buddy, I’ll walk you to your classroom.” We get to his classroom and not even his wonderfully enthusiastic teacher can get him to smile or go into the room. He just starts grabbing at me, wanting me to hold him. “Ok, buddy, I’ll come into the room and we can unpack your bag.” I take his folder out and the teacher’s helper distracts him so I can make my getaway. Shoot….he saw me leaving. I hear him burst into tears and see him running after me with his arms outstretched as I walk away. In this moment I am convinced there is nothing more heart-wrenching than seeing my child run to me in tears, while the door closes between us.

His teacher did call a short while later to let me know he had calmed down and was doing fine. (Praise God for wonderful teachers who not only care about my children, but care about the mama’s feelings as well!)

Each transition in our children’s lives can be both exciting and sad. Today was a reminder that my kids are growing faster than I can blink my eyes. Funny how slowly time drags when we’re kids, but as adults we just can’t seem to find enough hours in a day. Doesn’t really seem fair, does it? Why does time seem to go by faster the older we get?

I hope my son has a better day tomorrow, though I will admit there’s a small part of me that is happy he just wants to be with Mommy. It doesn’t matter how tired and disheveled I look, how many mistakes I feel I’ve made, or how many times I’ve had to be the disciplinarian. My son still sees me as “Supermom,” and nothing/no one could ever take away that amazing feeling.

Copyright Laura Gohl

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LauraHeadshotLaura Gohl has a loving and supportive husband, Bryon, and two children: Evelyn and Oliver. She can be viewed as a “Jack of all trades,” as she’s not afraid to learn and try new things. Prior to having children she managed a help desk, was the operations manager for a freight company, and was even a personal trainer. After having her first child in 2007 she made the decision to stay home and shortly after started a vacation rental business that has continued to blossom. In February 2015 she felt called to blog as well, and this was the start of “Supermom Wannabe” (www.supermamawannabe.com), where she hopes to bring a variety of anecdotes, crafts, ideas, and inspiration to others. Laura loves singing, all things Disney, watching movies, decorating cakes, travel, and most importantly: spending time with her family. She and her family have attended Holy Cross Lutheran Church since 2005.

About Douglas Brauner

I'm a retired pastor, blogger, and photographer. (Oh, and did I mention husband and father?) I encourage people who wrestle with life to focus on Christ so that they experience hope and joy on life's treadmill.

1 comments on “Without My Sidekick – by Laura Gohl

  1. Hi Laura, Thank you for this. I can’t believe my youngest is 8. I’ll be teaching my oldest to drive soon and I’ve been struck lately with the importance of not longing for the future or the past but absorbing everything out of the present that I can.

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